Hi Quintessential readers!!!!
The journal factory burned down so my hiatus is over. Here’s the life updates:
The Quintessential Team has been in strategy talks and will be using this new push of content to start creating more music content featuring Midwestern artists alongside your regular Quintessential programming. Keep an eye on this space!
My song PARADISE came out on June 3rd and I’m so happy with the reception it has had. Stream Paradise by Quinn Oslo wherever you love to get your music
I announced my debut EP I HAVE SEEN THE FUTURE which will be releasing on July 24
Speaking of which, July 25 (my birthday weekend) I’ve booked my first ever 90 minute headlining concert. I’ll be documenting my journey as a new artist preparing for this on my music TikTok @quinn.oslo
I just got to reprise my role volunteering as an alumni facilitator at an elite leadership fellowship for college students involved in a specific professional organization
This article is doing to document and reflect on a specific experience with some of my fellows in an airport bar as we waited to depart the event. It contains relationship drama, the revelation of an icon, my designation as the crazy but loyal friend, and a young English chap who gets everything he wants.
What Happened in This Airport Bar
Of the class of 17 college fellows, 3 were of legal American drinking age. I specify American because one fellow travelled all the way from England to our small intensive course in the rural Midwest and he partook with several pints as we viewed England playing Ghana in the World Cup.
To start off strong, two young ladies and I waited at the bar for nearly an excessive amount of time before a bartender came to wait on us. This bartender was pleasant and cheery with a heavy pour. Right before the third drink, a Malibu sunshine, was finished another woman came behind the bar with the aura of a commander. There was some tense riff raff behind the bar, and the original bartender had been dismissed.
This new woman informed us that she was not a bartender. She was the general manager of the alcohol serving establishments in the small local airport. With pure serious air, she checked our ids, something her predecessor did not do, and rung us up for our orders. We were impressed by her ability to take control of the situation, and we told her that we just got back from a leadership conference and saw the sauce in her.
“I’m an HR nightmare” she said.
We all wanted to know more, but we were too afraid to ask.
Before we walked away we made additional small talk about the World Cup game displayed on the bar TVs, England vs Ghana. She said she loved anyone with a British accent, and we let her know we had an Englishman in our group who’d be joining in just a few minutes. We followed through on the promise.
One member of our group went back up to the bar to get a double shot, and asked some follow up questions to the bartender. She learned that the kitchen worker was currently crying in the back because his boyfriend who also worked in the airport had just broken up with him and admitted to cheating.
Just to calibrate the GM’s situation, she had an out of commission kitchen with an active situation that needed handling, she was taking on the actual service role of bartending, and she was still providing quality service and making an impact on her patrons. We were floored. In awe. Impressed.
It became our table’s goal to get to know her story. We found out where she went to college, the extracurriculars she participated in, heard several entertaining stories. And she LOVED our Englishman comrade.
At one point she asked our table which one of us ladies would end up with him. The answer was none of us, we had only just met a few days ago in a professional setting and there’s a very clear long distance component so genuinely no one raised their hand. He opened up to her about his past relationship, and she advised that what a man really needs after a breakup is “a designated crazy girl friend who is out of her mind but like a sister.” She pointed right to me. She said id bail anyone at the table out of jail and fight in their corner with all my might.
I related. But more reflection on that later.
We continued building this relationship with our bartender, loving every moment of it. She claimed someone else on staff (sure… someone else) loved our Englishman and wanted to comp three classic American entrees and some mocktails for our underage friends. Since I’m writing this on the plane I have to check back and see how the developments are continuing. Maybe they found out who truly comped the food. Maybe they found out how the sad cook situation was handled. Maybe they saw a confrontation between the cook and his coworker ex. I’m excited to learn more when I land.
I was having such a good time, and so many drinks, and I was influenced by the students that I didn’t have to be at the gate 15 minutes before boarding time if I was in the final boarding group. I stayed juuuuust a little too long. I’ve already revealed that I’m on the plane, so you know I made it, but I need you readers to understand the urgency of the situation as I ran down the long concourse to make it to the plane with just one minute to spare.
I ended up upgraded from row 31 to row 3. Middle seat to aisle seat. My luck at this airport was out of this world.
Reflecting on Being Clocked as the Designated Crazy but Loyal Friend
“a designated crazy girl friend who is out of her mind but like a sister.”
I was absolutely gagged to be instantly clocked by this woman like this. All she had seen of me was me purchasing the first round of drinks for my three of age fellows and participating in our lively conversation. I can’t help but wonder What it is about me that gave this impression and why do I relate?
Luckily, I just finished up at an intensive, reflective, personal development and leadership experience so I’m in an introspective mood.
In terms of what it is about me, I’ll never have the luxury of perceiving myself from someone else’s POV. My instinct in this reflection is project my insecurities - what if she thinks I’m crazy because she can tell I have anxiety which is what makes me crazy? There’s no way that’s actually the case.
A more grounded speculation is that she could tell I had a few more years on the students, hence the “like a sister”. Or maybe she remembered how me and her bonded over going to school in New Orleans, an objectively crazy experience.
But why did I care so much about this? I think this comment was kind of a bookend to the whole leadership academy experience. My favorite part of facilitating at the event is getting to connect with all new people on a deep level.
It made me feel like I mattered to be seen as the type of person anyone could be friends with. I got to feel like I mattered after giving my all to make my fellows know that they mattered, too.
Does an Accent Get You Everything You Want?
So, we met a unicorn. But I have a lingering thought… were we really spoiled by the staff of this airport bar because we brought a Brit? Was there accent related pretty privilege happening that benefitted everyone at the table?
Personally, I think not. I suspect that we made her feel like she mattered too.
When we engaged with her, we had no agenda. We just had some genuine curiosity and admiration, and once that first young lady getting her double shot opened the door, we all joined in on this positive experience.
The Lesson
Human connection is easy in an isolated environment like a remote woodland leadership seminar. Human connection in the real world… not so much.
Being able to sit with the fellows, enjoy a drink, and immediately apply the teachings of curiosity, kindness, mattering, and belonging reminded me just how realistic it is to put leadership theories into practice in all aspects of our lives. The time and money spent traveling to facilitate, the countless donations made to the sponsoring organization, and the hundreds of volunteers and staff members that keep the fraternity operating day after day is all for something. It’s impacting people in big ways and small ways.
I’m proud to be the designated crazy girl who will love you like a sister. I’m happy to laugh and say that people with accents get everything they want. It was our way of really seeing each other in that bar.
About Quintessential
Thank you so much for reading! Quintessential is a collection of personal writings about how I am managing to live my life authentically as myself. You may be interested in this publication if you:
Want to follow the journey of a brand new indie artist in the midwest;
Are a young woman trying to make it in this world;
Enjoy niche topics;
Care about your communities around you;
Don’t take life too seriously; and
Want to know what makes me, me!