Remembering Liam and When Life was Easy
My One Direction Memorial Party and the Other Events That Prove My Childhood is Over
As everyone surely knows by now, Liam Payne from One Direction passed away in a tragic accident in Argentina. I first heard from a college friend who texted me while I was about to head out for a house tour. I thought it was fake news. When I realized it wasn’t, I immediately called my childhood best friend so she could hear it from me and not a headline. We both cried.
Since this news broke, I’ve intentionally taken time to reconnect with old friends, reminisce on the golden days of 1D, and consider all the ways that my life has changed since my fangirl days. In this blog post I’ll cover my One Direction memorial party, explain 1D’s impact on my life, and reflect on my transition to adulthood.
1D Memorial Party
Every directioner in my age bracket shares a key memory: the One Direction sleepover. This party would have been held in 2013 or 2014, and the itinerary included watching the One Direction video diaries, music videos, and consuming oodles of fan-made content all night long. Because of this universal experience held by all, what better way to memorialize Liam and work on reclaiming the fun and innocence of childhood by recreating the experience?
I drove into my hometown for the weekend and spent Friday night with my best friend Ashlyn. We started the night with our usual adult get-together at our favorite Thai restaurant, but after that we switched up. We went and had the 1D sleepover in my parents’ basement in true middle school fashion.
The itinerary for the night included all of the classics: the video diaries, extended cuts of their X Factor auditions, all X-Factor performances, their VEVO music videos, the adventurous adventures, and fan-made imagines.
The night was low key iconic, and we both thought it might have healed something deep down within us.
1D is the Reason I Write. True Story.
Stanning One Direction as a 13-year old in the golden age of Tumblr is an experience you could only understand if you were there. I was an extreme victim of the middle school awkward phase, so the mostly anonymized Tumblr platform was a good avenue to get into connecting with people over our shared love for 1D solely through written communication. It started with reblogs, and then some comments on other people’s posts, then I started creating my own posts, and I ultimately ended up running my own semi-famous fan fiction page. I used to get so many custom imagine requests that I started hiring out volunteer staff writer positions to get to everyone’s stories. I was literally girlbossing for free.
Without engaging with the Tumblr fandom this way, I don’t think I ever would have given writing a shot.
I won’t go further into my Tumblr history, but it was the push I needed to start finding good ways to connect with other girls my age. By 8th grade I was a little more normal and had some really strong bonds with my fellow directioners at school. One of my favorite memories with my directioners was the bittersweet day that Zayn announced he was leaving the group. We found out during lunch, and we cried together in a classroom. It obviously sucked that Zayn was leaving, but I remember personally feeling like it was my first time having a community of peers where it was safe to cry and feel these feelings for One Direction. The more I reflect on it, the more I realize how foundational that was for forming relationships for the rest of my life.
Another fun 1D memory was the fact that they played a huge stadium concert in my city on my 16th birthday. My friends and I that went had seats that totally got lost in the crowd, but I still felt like (y/n) while I was there. Getting to let go and be in fanfic delulu mode about Harry noticing me on my 16th birthday was so fun. I wonder how I can bring that dreamer energy back to my life now.
My Childhood is Officially Over, Isn’t It?
Reminiscing on the good old days made me realize just how different things really are now. I was 13, figuring out linear equations, staying up all night listening to music and writing fanfic, dreaming about what life could be. Now, I’m 25, one of my middle school best friends got married yesterday, I’m looking to buy a house, and I’m getting promoted to senior at work.
It isn’t necessarily a bad change, but it is shocking to have something like the death of Liam Payne pull you into reality. I’m pretty fulfilled in my life right now, and I like potentially being able to attribute that to lessons from One Direction. I keep saying to all my friends that I think 25 is the best thing that ever happened to me, now I know that it is just the start of my next nest chapter.