Sharing My Story: I Had a Parasite

Hello everyone.

You may have noticed my recent absence from writing on this blog. I’m here today, in a local coffee shop with two of my girlies, writing my story in a triumphant victory. With recent medical intervention, I was able to rid my body of a vicious parasite.

My journey involved a lot of stress, neglect of my body, and overall denial. I went through four weeks of symptoms before seeking medical attention. To save others from going through this experience, I am using my platform to share my parasite story.

How It Started

My work gives me access to the local paper, so one of my favorite bi-weekly hobbies is to read the health inspector reports. Since I remember everything that has ever happened to me, I keep a running mental inventory of the businesses that are on the violations list, sorted into buckets by severity. Restaurants dinged for things like the sink water in the customer bathrooms being a few degrees too cold are separated out from the businesses who keep their eggs at the wrong temperature or keep raw chicken out on the counter.

This one particular restaurant had one of the worst health inspector reports I ever saw, it downright disturbed me. But, I saw an ad for an excellent lunch deal and had to try it. Yummy! Sweet and sour pork!!!!!!!!! $5.99!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yummmmmmmmmm!!!!!!!! Delicious!!

I will not be revealing the name of the restaurant out of respect for local business owners and also because it was pretty tasty tbh I would go back and just get chicken, but not pork or seafood lol.

It wasn’t worth it. Two days later my curse began.

The Experience

For the purposes of this blog post, I will sugarcoat this. If you want the dirty details send me a Substack message or hit me up on Instagram (@qmariecole)!

Let me set the stage for you, it was the holiday season, I had just bought my first house, new year’s was coming, norovirus was on the surge, hot girls with tummy issues were trending, I was moving, and we got 19 inches of snow. At what point in there would I have gone to the doctor?

Sure, every time I ate something I was in the bathroom less than 30 minutes later, I wasn’t sleeping, I was rapidly losing weight, and having numerous other symptoms. But I just attributed it all to stress. How was I to know that there was a little guy in my body disrupting my digestive system.

For the sake of not getting gross on here, I really don’t have much more to say about the experience. It was hell, but I managed to appear mostly normal despite everything. No one suspected a thing except my boyfriend, but i just told him i have IBS and case closed.

Medical Intervention

Warning: They will look at your butthole.

I finally caved and went to the doctor after four weeks. I knew this wasn’t normal. It just wasn’t letting up.

Another perk of my job, other than the local paper subscription, is an onsite health clinic. I made a same day appointment and went in to see the NP. I described my symptoms and she seemed to know instantly what it was. I got a quick physical exam that was uncomfortable to say the least, and then rolled out with some prescriptions.

After this diagnosis I revealed the presence of my parasite to two of my most trusted people nearby. We decided to name it Han, after my ex-situationship because it was eating away at me and making me miserable, much like Han, my ex-situationship.

Within three days of taking the medication, it finally happened. I dropped my first solid turd in weeks. I was floored, I’d almost forgotten what it felt like to have a clear colon. I kept looking in the toilet thinking I’d perhaps see a live worm or something like that, but I didn’t. Two days later, I felt like a million bucks! I went to Arby’s with my mom, I ate at Qdoba during work, and I went to get Thai food with my boyfriend, all with no issues. I have emerged a new woman.

Takeaways

What I hope you all take away from my story are these items:

Don’t suffer in silence.

If you think you’re pooping yourself to death, you probably are. Go see a doctor, queen!

Don’t play too fast and loose with food safety.

Do your homework, health inspector reports are public information for a reason. Educate yourself. Eat types of foods that are less likely to contain food borne illnesses, and go to restaurants with high standards of cleanliness.

Thanks for reading my blog! If you’ve ever had a parasite too, please leave a comment!

Xoxo

Quinn!